Showing posts with label Guy Finley. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Guy Finley. Show all posts

Monday, May 5, 2008

The Part Where You Let Go (Hem)

From yesterday's Gimundo:


Chen Si, of Nanjing, China, is a very special kind of lifeguard. He doesn't wear a swimsuit, he isn't paid a penny for his work, and he's never even dipped a toe into the waters of the Yangtze River.

Nonetheless, since the 34-year-old began patrolling the Nanjing Bridge four years ago, he has saved 144 lives.

Chen began his rescue mission in 2004, while feeling guilty about the suicide of an elderly neighbor. "I thought to myself, 'Why didn't I go visit him, talk to him?'" he told The Los Angeles Times. "Maybe I could have saved his life."

So that weekend, he went to Nanjing Bridge, a landmark that's notorious as a destination for suicide jumpers. Since the bridge's opening 40 years ago, over 1,000 people have killed themselves by jumping into the water. Chen decided that, even if he couldn't save his neighbor, at least he may be able to save others from throwing their lives away.

On his first day patrolling the bridge, he came across a man in the process of crawling over the bridge's railing. I grabbed him by the waist, he hardly fought back," said Chen. "I pressed him to the ground. He started to cry."

The would-be jumper was distraught after losing his money to a con man, and believed that suicide was the only way out. But after Chen prevented him from jumping, the man realized he still had a lot to live for – his wife and children. Because the man was now penniless, Chen gave him enough money for bus fare to return home to his family.

"In a time of crisis, all people really need is one person willing to lend a hand," Chen said. "It could make the difference between life and death."

Shi Xiqing, another would-be jumper, who is now one of Chen's best friends, agrees. "This bridge needs people like him," Shi said. "Without him, I would not be here today."


BOOK: Secret of Letting Go by Guy Finley

POEM: Today by William Stafford

The ordinary miracles begin. Somewhere
a signal arrives: "Now," and the rays
come down. A tomorrow has come. Open
your hands, lift them: morning rings
all the doorbells; porches are cells for prayer.
Religion has touched your throat. Not the same now,
you could close your eyes and go on full of light.

And it is already begun, the chord
that will shiver glass, the song full of time
bending above us. Outside, a sign:
a bird intervenes; the wings tell the air,
"Be warm." No one is out there, but a giant
has passed through town, widening streets, touching
the ground, shouldering away the stars.

QUOTE: "Smile, breathe and go slowly." ~ Thich Nhat Hanh

Tuesday, January 1, 2008

Welcome in Another Year (Zoe Mulford)

Happy New Year!

In her December 28, 2007 blog, Resolution Revolution: A Better Way to Start Your Year, Christine Kane writes:

The reason most resolutions don’t work is that they address only one level of your life. The DO level. It’s the DO-HAVE-BE model. “I will DO this thing.” (i.e., Lose weight) “So I can HAVE this other thing” (Self-Esteem) and I can BE this thing. (Confident.)

The average New Year’s Resolution doesn’t address the core of the issue - the “BE” level.

The best order for creating positive changes in your life is the BE-DO-HAVE model. This means you start from the BE level. When you begin changing on the BE level of your life, then the DO level and the HAVE level follow more easily.

When you start only on the DO level, then all the blocks on the BE level will often become the obstacles you can’t overcome.

Several years ago, my friend Kathy and I decided that, instead of making resolutions, we would pick a word that would guide us throughout the year. It would be our touchstone. It would remind us of living our lives at the BE level.

The word I've chosen is Release - it was actually Christine's primary example and it almost felt like cheating to pick it... but every time I'd attempt to consider something else, Release kept coming back into the forefront of my brain and wouldn't allow the possibility of any other concept.

For decades I've used the phrase "relate, relax, release", accompanied by motions (hands on hips, hands on shoulders, hands flung into the air over my head) which, I am embarrassed to say, I borrowed from an episode of A Different World, the sitcom with Lisa Bonet which spun off from The Cosby Show - upon just now Googling the term, I find I've had it in the wrong order all these years (oh f*cking well... :-)

So... Release feels perfect, for its many meanings, incarnations and subtleties - for the next 366 days (it's a leap year!), I intend to:

RELEASE untruthful relationships

RELEASE undue stress caused by overcommitment

RELEASE unrealistic expectations, of others *and* myself

RELEASE unwanted clutter

RELEASE unhealthy habits

RELEASE unproductive pettiness

And I am sure there are so many more aspects of this multi-faceted word that can be both a noun and a verb I've yet to discover - in a nutshell, if I don't love it (whatever "it" fits the situation), I've vowed to let it go...

Relate, relax, RELEASE - I feel better already... :-)

SONG: Welcome in Another Year by Zoe Mulford
(lyrics unavailable but Zoe's website here)

BOOK: 365 Days to Let Go: Daily Insights to Change Your Life by Guy Finley

POEM: New Year's Resolution by Philip Appleman

Well, I did it again, bringing in
that infant Purity across the land,
welcoming Innocence with gin
in New York, waiting up
to help Chicago,
Denver, L.A., Fairbanks, Hon-
olulu--and now
the high school bands are alienating Dallas,
and girls in gold and tangerine
have lost all touch with Pasadena,
and young men with muscles and missing teeth
are dreaming of personal fouls,
and it's all beginning again, just like
those other Januaries in
instant reply.

But I've had enough
of turning to look back, the old
post-morteming of defeat:
people I loved but didn't touch,
friends I haven't seen for years,
strangers who smiled but didn't speak--failures,
failures. No,
I refuse to leave it at that, because
somewhere, off camera,
January is coming like Venus
up from the murk of December, re-
virginized, as innocent
of loss as any dawn. Resolved: this year
I'm going to break my losing streak,
I'm going to stay alert, reach out,
speak when not spoken to,
read the minds of people in the streets.

I'm going to practice every day,
stay in training, and be moderate
in all things.
All things but love.

QUOTE(S): "The object of a New Year is not that we should have a new year. It is that we should have a new soul and a new nose; new feet, a new backbone, new ears, and new eyes. Unless a particular man made New Year resolutions, he would make no resolutions. Unless a man starts afresh about things, he will certainly do nothing effective." ~ G.K. Chesterton

"We spend January 1 walking through our lives, room by room, drawing up a list of work to be done, cracks to be patched. Maybe this year, to balance the list, we ought to walk through the rooms of our lives... not looking for flaws, but for potential." ~ Ellen Goodman